The names of the prisons, prisoners and officers have been altered; otherwise, this is a true account of the UK Prison Service.

Have you ever wondered what goes on behind the imposing walls of a prison? Are you curious about the daily lives of prison officers and the secrets they guard so closely? Prepare to have your questions answered and your assumptions challenged with my upcoming book, HMP Screwed: Reflections of a Former Prison Officer, due for release on June 20, 2024. Reflections are from my limited time spent in the UK Prison Service.

At HMP Screwed encompasses the notorious HMP Phantom and HMP Albion. I experienced firsthand the paranoia and suspicion that pervaded the prison service. From the moment I arrived, whispers of distrust followed me through the corridors. To my colleagues and superiors, I was not just a new recruit; I was a threat—a presumed undercover journalist intent on exposing their darkest secrets.

What were they hiding? What could instil such fear in a place that supposedly upholds justice and order?

The Suspicion of McIntyre in the UK Prison Service.

One evening, as I sat alone in the break room, an old guard named Eldridge entered with a look of concern on his face. "You know, McIntyre," he said with a nervous laugh, "people are talking. They think you're some sort of agent, here to expose the prison service, maybe an undercover reporter. Just thought you should know."

We both laughed, but his laughter was tinged with anxiety, not joy. The paranoia was unhinged, and there was no reason for it. So, I decided to play along. I began dropping subtle hints, leaving notebook pages scribbled with things like 'for the editor', 'story idea' and 'salacious!', scribbling notes in the margins, and making offhand comments about journalistic integrity and investigative pieces.

The Departure from HMP Screwed and the UK Prison Service.

When I finally submitted my notice, management immediately accepted it without question. Their relief was palpable; in fact, one manager randomly approached me on the wings of HMP Phantom to enthusiastically shake my hand, and his face communicated relief that I was leaving.

What were they so desperate to conceal? As I left prison for the last time, the air felt fresher, cleaner, and untarnished from the activities on the other side, the paranoia, and the untamed attitudes. I couldn't shake the feeling that I had to tell the story. The truth needed to come out.

What Are They Hiding?

• Corruption and Inefficiency: What systemic issues plague the prison service?

• Unqualified Management: How do unqualified leaders contribute to the chaos?

• Mistreatment of Inmates: What kind of conditions do prisoners really face?

• Fear of Exposure: Why is there such a strong reaction to the idea of being watched?